There is nothing quite like a good story. We're always telling stories - telling stories to ourselves about ourselves.

Our history, culture, the future we're heading to, how we got here. Some experiences are particularly salient and palpable because of key events that would make for an intriguing story. Stories make our brains light up and our neurons fire, because a good story is life. That's all we know how to do. Tell and listen to stories. We tell stories through our actions, through our groups, through our personalities and dynamics. Heck - I'm telling you a story right now. Every company sells a story of what they are, and how they got there, and where they're going.

Every item, where they are placed, how they are placed. The colour of the skies, the sound of your fridge humming away. How does it sound? How does it make you feel? It's telling you a story.

"Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country", "Just do it!", "In God we trust", "Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water", "The champ is here", "It's finger-lickin' good".

But what makes a good story? Whether you're watching a film, reading a novel, or living your own life - the elements remain the same:

• Conflict and tension - Something must be at stake. The hero faces obstacles, challenges, uncertainty. Without friction, there's no movement, no growth, no reason to care.
• Character transformation - The protagonist can't end where they began. A good story tracks change - learning, failing, evolving. You are not the same person you were five years ago, and that's the story.
• Specificity and detail - Generic narratives fade instantly. It's not "a car" - it's your father's '92 Honda with the broken AC and the coffee stain on the passenger seat. Details make stories real, memorable, alive.
• Emotional resonance - A good story makes you feel something. Fear, joy, longing, triumph. If you're numb to your own narrative, you're sleepwalking through it.
• A throughline or purpose - Even if the path is messy, there should be a direction, a thread you can follow. What is this story about? What's the question it's trying to answer?
• Authenticity - The story must be yours. Not borrowed, not performed for an audience that doesn't matter. The truth, even when it's uncomfortable, always makes for better storytelling than the prettied-up version.
• Stakes that matter - Why should anyone care? What will be won or lost? In your own life, this means identifying what actually matters to you - not what you think should matter.

Depending on the lens from which you look there are 5 or 6 ways with which to interpret your current situation. Whether it's a tragedy or a comedy, good or bad, positive or negative - believe it or not - is entirely up to you (well mostly up to you). Sure things are happening, but how do you react to them? And what story do you want to tell yourself?

According to the Pareto Principle - 20 percent of your time requires 80 percent of your attention. Pay attention to those times and your story will become clear. There's almost something like a quiet voice gently nudging you in the direction you're meant to go. Pay attention and your story will become clear.